I Bite She Sucks by Penelope Bloom-Review tour

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I threw a paper airplane love note from my window.
First mistake.
I aimed it at a gorgeous stranger and put my address on it.
Second mistake.
Yep. You guessed it. I missed and hit a werewolf instead.
Best thing that ever happened to me?

Next thing I knew, a large angrily attractive werewolf man was trying to get in my apartment. I introduced him to my baseball bat and figured that was the end of things.

Or not.

Because my well-meaning sister became a vampire to cure my immune disorder. Long story. In the process, she got a deadly team of fang bangers to hunt us for breaking their rules. Longer story. A+ for good intentions and a D- for execution, if you ask me.

Re-enter Mr. Grumpy and Growly werewolf. He’s going to be my bodyguard slash kidnapper, whether I like it or not. Apparently, he’s the only thing standing between me and certain death. Swoon, right?

Of course he hates all things vampire. A.K.A. he will take me from undead to dead-dead if he figures out what I’m becoming.

Thankfully, he has completely underestimated my ability to woo him with my adorable innocence, cheery disposition, and extreme powers of modesty.

As long as the feelings stay one-sided, I’ll be fine. Because giving your heart to a guy who is probably going to try to murder you is a recipe for disaster. And come on. When was the last time I made a catastrophic, life-threatening mistake?

••••••••••

REVIEW:I must have laughed through half of that book. The wit was dry and the retorts came back thick and fast.

Penelope Bloom has such a way with words. This is my first book by this author, but if they are all this funny, then I can see her books popping onto my kindle pretty soon.

Sylvie has an immune deficiency, that makes her susceptible to any germ, so she stays indoors as much as she can, reading books, dreaming of a big love affair and having interesting conversations with her cat (with a fabulous attitude and name)

Mr. Grumpy and Growly Aka Riggs is a lone werewolf, grumpy and surly, but always with food in his hand. He spots trouble circling an apartment and goes to investigate, he gets more than he bargains for….. These two meet after a misunderstanding involving a love note (it’s a funny moment and I don’t want to spoil it) and a baseball bat!

Riggs is then keeping an eye on the girl as she smells like a she’s been near a vampire recently, well that’s his excuse and he’s sticking to it!! He keeps an eye out and is rewarded when a vamp enters her apartment building….. Riggs hates vampires (we find out why) and won’t tolerate anyone that associates with them. But rescuing Sylvie and her sister (and a half dead vampire!) seems like a good idea at the time. Getting the pack to agree to letting them stay that’s going to prove interesting.

The cast of supporting characters in this book were truly amazing.

Maisey (Sylvie’s sister) who becomes a vampire in the hopes of saving her sister, she’s so funny and compassionate. Riggs friend Felix is a good friend and is usually around to cause Riggs a headache. Then the coven of vampires which aren’t too keen on members biting humans without permission, so the sisters have been warned to leave the area or face being killed!

The werewolf pack don’t like vamps, they will take them out if possible! But there is a vampire splinter group, they want to do away with the coven, and lead a better life. Not Riggs’s problem, he doesn’t care if both groups of vampires kill each other! But when Sylvie attracts the wrong attention, he’s going to have to step in and protect her! And take her back to the pack!

It’s then a non stop ride. Internal dialogues, snarky comments thrown at one another and situations you’ll either laugh at or worry that Sylvie will meet an untimely end! Really well written and completely different from the usual vampire/shifter stories I usually read.

If you want a laugh out loud read, then pick this one up. But be prepared to be looked at strangely (I made the mistake of reading it in the park!) My sniggers got a fair bit of attention ?

 

Copy supplied for review

? Reviewed by Julie B.

I’m a USA Today Bestselling Author and have written nearly a dozen top 50 amazon bestsellers, including four books that have hit the top 10! Despite all that, I’m still a nervous wreck before I release every new book and I still feel like I have so much more to learn about writing and publishing than I can even wrap my head around. 

I’m just beyond honored and humbled that so many readers have embraced me and found enjoyment in my words, because I can’t think of any better opportunity than this. 

When I’m not writing and stressing about what I’m going to write, I’m trying to wrangle my two little girls who are 2 and a half and 1 and a half. When I’m not wrangling them, I’m trying to keep my husband in line. 

Writing and helping run the family aren’t easy, but I’d never trade it for anything!

Connect with Penelope Bloom:

Website: https://www.penelope-bloom.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PenelopeBloomRomance
Amazon Author Page: https://amzn.to/3x321jR
Goodreads: https://bit.ly/32ifAh2
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bloompenelope/