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HARLEQUIN ROMANCE SURVEY-Relationships

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Sex & Relationships-Harlequin Romance Survey

SURPRISING SEX AND RELATIONSHIP FINDINGS

 

by Lisa Blake
Earlier this month, Harlequin, the famous publisher of romance novels and other types of “reading entertainment for women,” released its annual Romance Report findings.

How does your relationship compare to the HR survey?  Do you agree with the findings?

 

And seriously, 12% said…” liked his cute dog” *sigh*….The survey does NOT say how old the participants were, but something tells me…the age is quite young.

http://lifestyle.sympatico.ca/Relationships/galleries/articles/romance_survey_findings.htm?feedname=photo_gallery_lifestyle_romance_report&pos=1&nolookup=true

The study surveyed women about various aspects of our contemporary romantic situation, such as how we feel about our love lives, what we look for and don’t look for in a partner, and how we communicate in the age of smartphones and Facebook.

“Today, women consider themselves more independent and powerful than ever before – yet we’ve found that many of the traditional beliefs about romance, dating and relationships still persist,” said Harlequin’s Senior Manager of Public Relations, Michelle Renaud, in a statement. “Additionally, we are seeing new challenges as women are managing their image on a digital level. There is a real need to curate an online persona as much as a real-life presence in an extremely connected society.”
Let’s take a look at some of the key findings and discover something about ourselves! Men should really be reading this too. It would give you guys a little insight.

1. We’re bored, bored, bored
64% of respondents reported that their dating life was ”boring” — regardless of relationship status! Guys, if you’re reading this, take note! We need you to step it up.

2. We’re optimistic
Good news, though. 84% believe romance is out there and they will find it, while 89% of women believe that the best days of their love lives are still ahead. So, there’s hope.

3. We know what we like
The “traditional charms” of a man remain the most popular ”turn-ons.” These are, sense of humor (82%), killer smile (57%) and, amusingly, an “accent” (23%). 12% liked him having a cute dog.

4. We like chivalry
91% of women surveyed believe dating rules have become more flexible, yet just over half of us still expect a man to ask a woman out (59%), hold the door for us (54%) and pay for the first date (51%).

5. We do our research
52% of us use Facebook to research a prospective first date. 17% Google him and 5% check out his Twitter. How we contact a prospective date depends on how old we are. Text messages were most popular among 21-24 year olds (74%) while older women prefer to make a phone call (80%) and 18-20 year olds are significantly more likely to communicate via Facebook than older women.

6. We send sexy messages (and some of us send naked pictures)
52% of women aged 25-35 said they have never participated in online dating. 43% of single women have sent “sexts” (sexual text messages) and 27% of all women have sent a naked photo in an email or text. Those in a serious relationship are even more likely to send sexts (57%).

7. We know what we don’t like
Among the top factors women listed as ”deal breakers” were being too needy (32%), dependence on a BlackBerry/ iPhone (31%), having too many Facebook photos with an ex-girlfriend (29%), being grammatically challenged (24%) and still living with his parents (20%).

8. We define romance as “thoughtfulness.”
Women surveyed counted “thoughtfulness” (76%), “appreciation” (70%) and “intimacy” (67%) as definitions of romance. Also high were remembering the small details (56%) and being protective (37%). Less common words used to describe romance were “sex” (26%), fantasy (15%) and “gifts” (11%).

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OVERCOMING WRITER’S BLOCK

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We found an article last week about the craziness of writers.  But the more I read through the article, the more I thought…”yes, this writer is crazy.”

The fact that many of us are bloggers ( and there are those of you who do not realize you are bloggers) I found a few suggestions to overcome the dreaded–“Writer’s Block”.

 

From an article written by David Risley

Even with all the time I spend helping bloggers, there is one problem that has always stumped me: writer’s block.

I have the ability to pump out posts pretty quickly and it obviously comes in handy for me. However, many others that I work with get completely stumped when it comes to actually writing for their blog.

What do I write about? Will people care? Is it any good?

What happens is that you sit down to write a post and you spend more time in introspective thought than actually writing.

Another issue I see a lot is that some bloggers are writing, but from their audience’s standpoint. So, the entire time they’re writing, they’re constantly self-judging and nit-picking at the post from somebody else’s standpoint.

In other words, you’re doing everything except ACTUAL WRITING. The result is that you either don’t write at all, or it takes you FOREVER to produce a blog post.

Ironically, many times, the evidence of this is obvious to me. I’ll get LONG emails from people, yet they’ll tell me they have a hard time writing. :) Obviously not. I got this uber-long email to prove it. The problem is that they tense up when they know others will be reading it.

Successful bloggers write, they don’t think about writing.

At the core of the solution here, I believe you need to be yourself (not your reader) when you produce a blog post. This is a matter of mindset. You need to make the conscious decision NOT to self-judge.

Do what you’re doing while you’re doing it, in other words. Writing and editing are two different jobs and you cannot and should not be wearing both hats at the same time.

So, here’s a little trick you might want to try. It is a little crazy. :)

Turn off your monitor.

Have an idea, a thought, a concept that you want to communicate to your reader. Go to the screen where you will begin typing the post. Then, simply hit the power button on your monitor in order to turn it off. Then, just start typing blindly. Type as if you were talking out the concept to a friend sitting there in the room. Just type what you would say. Don’t worry about formatting, typos, grammar – anything.

When you’re done, turn the monitor back on. At this point, you’ll change hats. Stop being the writer and start being the editor. Fix typos, grammar and just generally ensure the post reads well.

If my description of writing above is pretty much you, you might want to give this little trick a try and see if it works for you.

http://www.davidrisley.com/writers-block/

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TEN KISSES TO EXCITE

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TEN KISSES TO EXCITE

Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and we are offering up some kissing advice to excite you and your partner.

Does kissing your spouse mean a quick peck on the lips before you leave for the office? Spice up your love life with these 10 new kisses to try. Get ready to pucker up! By Good Housekeeping.

 

1. The Butterfly Kiss

Bring your face very close to that of your partner and then flutter your eyelashes rapidly. For the ultimate fringe effect, glue on a pair of temporary false eyelashes and wink away.

 

2. The Earlobe Kiss

Suck your partner’s earlobe, taking care not to make any loud noises or sudden movements that might startle him. Bonus points if you whisper something sexy.

 

3. The Finger Kiss
While relaxing with your partner, take his/her fingers and suck on them slowly

 

4. The Foot Kiss


Gently suck on your partner’s toes and then kiss his foot very lightly. If you or your spouse is self-conscious about odor, take a relaxing shower or bath together beforehand.

5. The Forehead Kiss
Sweetly brush your lips across your partner’s forehead.

 

6. The Freeze Kiss

Put an ice cube into your mouth and kiss your spouse, while passing the cube to his mouth with your tongue. The icy sensation will give you both a pleasant shock.

7. The Hot and Cold Kiss
Lick your partner’s lips to make them warm and then blow on them to make them cold.

8. The Lip-Sucking Kiss
Suck on your partner’s lower lip while kissing to break up your usual routine.

9. The Nip Kiss

Slightly nibble on your partner’s lips while kissing. Take it slow and easy to determine a pleasurable, not painful, amount of pressure for the object of your affection.

 

10. The Trickle Kiss
Take a small sip of your favorite drink and then trickle it into your partner’s mouth while kissing.

 

 

http://ca.shine.yahoo.com/photos/10-kisses-you-ve-never-tried-1328208515-slideshow/1-butterfly-kiss-photo-2234967-222000273.html

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5 Deadly Terms Used by a Woman

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5 Deadly Terms Used by a Woman according to Whoopi, should be included in all marriage and significant other contracts.

John Wing Jr, a comedian originally from Canada, has similar guidelines when talking with his wife. The only FOUR words a man will ever need.

 

 

1. OH       2.  YEAH     3.   RIGHT      4.   SORRY

John Wing:  If a guy is married, all a guy needs to have a successful marriage are 4 little words: OH, YEAH, RIGHT, SORRY. Use them individually or in a cluster.

Example:

Wife:  Honey, I thought you were going to cut the lawn?

Husband: Oh…..Yeah….Right….Sorry.

Do we all agree?!?!?!?!?!?!?

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Karen Ranney-Why A Book is a Great Bargain

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Most books are priced in the $7.99 – $8.99 range, which I think is an absolute bargain for entertainment. Let’s face it, it’s just about the cheapest thing you can find to entertain yourself for a night or for a few nights.

Here are some other unexpected perks to a book:

 

 

1. No babysitter required.

2. You don’t have to get all dressed up. However, if getting dressed up is your thing, have at it.

3. You can eat, smoke, and play with your hair when you read. How many other forms of entertainment lets you do all that simultaneously?

4. You don’t have to drive anywhere. At gas at over $3.50/gallon, that’s a big deal.

5. No crying babies – unless they’re yours.

6. No standing in line.

7. No whining from anyone – can we go home now? Are we there yet? Do I have to eat that? Why can’t I have more popcorn?

8. Sex is often featured.

9. You can keep it and read it again.

10. You can forget who you are and be someone else within the covers of a book.

Can you think of any other assets to a book?

http://karenranney.wordpress.com/

WHO IS KAREN RANNEY?

New York Times bestselling author Karen Ranney was first published in 1995. Since then, she’s gone on to write dozens of historical romances, most of them set in Scotland.  Karen also writes romance and mystery novels under the name Katherine Storm.

Her books have been described as evocative, intensely romantic stories featuring characters who leap off the page.

As an Air Force brat, Karen lived all over the world. In addition to being trapped in East Berlin and lost in Russia, she also numbers among her early adventures having her first date in Paris and traveling the entire route of the Orient Express.

She wanted to be an archeologist, a Foreign Service Officer, or a violinist. Instead, she became a decorated Navy Wave, a journalist, and the somewhat bemused mother of two sons. She’s also moderated a daily radio program, been a motivational speaker, and admits to having had more than six careers, among them Purchasing Director, Help Desk Analyst, Marketing Director, and a Human Resources Manager.

However, it is her love of books and a fascination with writing that have remained constant throughout her life. Writing allows her to live vicariously, travel to other centuries and answer that one eternal question – What if?

http://karenranney.wordpress.com/about-author/

The Reading Cafe is looking forward to our future interview with the wonderful Karen Ranney.  Also, look for Karen on her blog…WARM FUZZIES…it is a great way to start the day.

 Sandy

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Writing a Romance Novel

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From: Cracked.com

Romance Novel Plots

The basic plot of a romance novel involves a man and a woman fall in love and live happily ever after. Typically, the two don’t get along at first and face many obstacles, but these are always resolved by the last page. Romance novels gain their variety by different types of characters and settings. Some of the more popular varieties are:

Historical Romance
A man and a woman living in the past meet and do it*. No one dies of dysentery.

Paranormal Romance
A woman falls in love with a vampire. They do it.

Sci-fi Romance
A man and a woman do it. In space.

*Although it is always hinted at, actual portrayal of sex is usually limited to the erotic romance novels genre. This type contains more graphic sex scenes, although they are really not that graphic. Most of the other types just have kissing, though.

Read more: Romance Novels | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/funny-1950-romance-novels/#ixzz1jPT0h0qQ

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Romance Novel Characters

The Man

The male lead character of a romance novel is either a cowboy, a pirate, a member of the military, a vampire, or all of the above. He is usually experienced in the ways of females, which is okay because herpes does not exist in the romance novel universe. He has a reckless and dashing personality that the strong and flighty heroine finds highly irritating, until she doesn’t.
He is unfailing tall and handsome. Despite his highly masculine pursuits that in real life would involve going unwashed for several days or weeks, he always has impeccable grooming. This grooming occurs naturally, of course, because waxing your chest isn’t manly.

The Woman

The woman is extraordinarily beautiful, although no one really appreciates how beautiful she is except for the hero. She is usually a virgin, by choice, because she is far too strong to fall for a man. Except, of course, for the one man who captures her heart. Her initial irritation at this man is of course just a disguise for the fact that she is wildly in love with him.

Romance Novel Controversies

The innocence and optimism of romance novel plots makes them the subject of much scorn among many, who argue that they create unrealistic expectations in women by implying complete fulfillment in love.

We think that the idea that romance novels could be bad for women is itself unrealistic, because what young woman wouldn’t want to be ravished by pirates?
Another common complaint is that the plots glorify authoritarian males and quasi-rape. This theme can apparently be seen in titles like Captive Bride and Bargained Into Her Boss’s Bed

A feminist romance publisher founded in response to such claims, which released such titles as Domestic Partnership with the Yoga Teacher Who Quit Work To Be A Stay At Home Dad and The Man Who Followed All Of The Workplace Sexual Harrassment Guidelines, was less than successful.

Read more: Romance Novels | Cracked.com http://www.cracked.com/funny-1950-romance-novels/#ixzz1jPTOwBH
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How Not To Imitate A Romance Novel

Since romance novels presumably provide a view into the psyches of millions of female readers, you may be tempted, if so inclined, to look into them for tips for pursuing women. If you do so, please keep the following in mind:

If a woman is irritated by your presence, it might because she is a repressed, lonely dreamer yearning for the true love she feels for you but denies. But it is far more likely that she isn’t amused by your psoriasis and extensive quoting of Family Guy.

“Bodice rippers” is another popular title for romance novels, but in real life you should hold off on ripping women’s bodices. Not only is it illegal, those things are very expensive.

Long hair is a common feature on romance novel covers, but she probably won’t be impressed unless you have actually washed it in the last six months. Similarly, open shirts are not that attractive if you haven’t done anything about the Dorito pieces in your chest hair.

Although pirates are a common theme, shouting ‘Yarr! I’m a pirate!’ will probably not make many young women swoon with desire.
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I think this speaks for itself……my mind can’t seem to stop wandering back to the image of Doritos in the chest hair……ewwwwwwww

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