I UNLOVE YOU by Matthew Turner-Review, Guest Post and Giveaway
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ABOUT THE BOOK: Release Date December 1, 2015
My name is Ausdylan Elvis Ashford, a twenty-two-year-old who leads a rather perfect life. With a steady job straight out of university, a charismatic best friend I’m in a band with, and a girlfriend I’ve loved since the moment I first gazed upon, I couldn’t ask for more. Until my perfect girlfriend, B, changed both of our lives forever.
It began with the words, “I’m pregnant,” and the realisation I’d soon guide a new life into this world. Embarking on my own journey of self-discovery, I found new meaning in love, living, friendship, and family. This should have become the greatest love story of all, but I assure you it isn’t.
Sometimes true love and unbreakable trust is built upon lies and deceit. Sometimes those you know better than anyone turn out to be strangers you don’t know at all. My name is Aus, and this is my (un)love story .
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REVIEW: I UNLOVE YOU is a stand alone storyline that focuses on the relationship between three friends: Ausdylan (Aus) Elvis Ashford, Beatrice (B) Butterworth, and Joseph (Joey) Johnston, who for ten or more years had one another’s back, fronts and everything in between.
Told from first person point of view (Aus) using flashbacks, memories and present day I UNLOVE YOU follows the beginning of the end for our trio. Aus has been in love with B for as long as he can remember, and they have been in a sexual relationship for a number of years. But all is about to change when B announces she is pregnant, and life as they know begins to crumble and fall.
I UNLOVE YOU focuses on family, friendship, betrayal and lies. There is nothing more heartbreaking than uncovering the ugly truth; the depth to which someone will hide painful memories, burying the facts behind a fake smile, and a loving hug. The fidelity of a relationship lies not within the boundaries of the heart but lies deep within the soul where betrayal cuts like a knife leaving one’s soul to bleed. Sometimes there is no recovery; no forgiveness; no moving on. The mind is unable to comprehend the depth of dishonesty; the heart is broken, unable to repair; the soul bleeds until it can bleed no more. But sometimes the reality of life is much harder to control when innocence is lost to demons of the past.
The premise is well structured with backstory and history between our leading characters, especially between Aus and B, but also looks at the loving friendship and support between Joey and Aus. Matthew Turner’s characterizations come through first person observations wherein Aus allows the reader into his emotional mindset as it pertains to the different roles and interactions between characters. The storyline conflict is both internal and external for Aus Ashford-life and everything it has to offer pulls the rug out from under our ‘hero’ as he must come to grips with what is and what will never be. Matthew Turner’s use of flashbacks and memories, although a very integral part of the storyline, was a little confusing at times as a number of timelines appeared to overlap (or perhaps were not delineated enough for this reader). The imagery was descriptive; the world building allowed the reader a front row seat into the day to day routines of the storyline narrator. As to the mindset of the leading character, the tone is well established in the prologue as we get a glimpse into the future wherein Aus has fallen into a personal h*ll.
Matthew Turner’s I UNLOVE YOU is an impassioned and profound look at friendship and betrayal; the emotional fall out of lies and deceit; the powerful emotion of love and the drive to be loved. I UNLOVE YOU is not a story of hearts and flowers, or a happily ever after but a story about the reality of falling in love, and letting go.
Copy supplied by the author.
Reviewed by Sandy
“Urghhh,” I groan, my head throbbing and throat dry.I close my eyes, light’s burden’s too great. My mind continues its unstable spin. Clenching my fists, I try and force my hands to my face, but I’m unable to move. I’m too heavy, far too heavy, as if something or somebody sits on my chest. What can I remember? What the hell happened? Where on earth am I?
The last thing I recall is standing outside of work, catching my breath after storming out of Tony’s office. Did I really say all those things to him? Did I tell him to sit down and shut up whilst I stood in his office? I couldn’t have. I wouldn’t have…only, I did. I remember it. I remember the white room and his drained face. It doesn’t seem real, but it is.
“What the hell?” I whisper, each word whistling through my cracked lips.Blinking, I open my eyes long enough to explore the strange place where I lay: blue and grey tiles reach up to a cracked ceiling; an extractor fan vibrates in the corner, covered in dirt and murk; and a patch of green mould encircling a brown centre. I appear to be in a bathroom, and a rather grim one at that.
I take a deep breath and focus my thoughts, but all I do is disturb my fragile stomach. I hurt, all over. Not just aches and pains of muscles and tendons, but a throbbing surge running up my left arm. I tap my right fingers against the hard, tiled floor, and run my nails along its surface to my thigh and onto my frozen skin.I hadn’t realised until now, but I’m cold; numb, even. Running my hand up and down my right side, all I find are boxer shorts, as damp and cold as my skin. “What the hell happened?” I mumble, using all my strength to roll on to my side.
The pain running up my left arm intensifies, the pounding in my head gets heavier, the rumble in my stomach an unbearable tumble. “What have you done?” I mumble again, struggling up into a sitting position and evaluating the chaos around me.
Two fallen and finished bottles of cheap whisky lay to my right, and a half-eaten burger to my left. All alone in this bare bathroom, I’m surrounded by a toilet and a sink, a cracked mirror above it. No towels, pictures, or semblance of life. No toilet roll, toothbrushes or shower. Just me and my mess, and a pile of vomit inches from my hand.
“Oh, God,” I say, edging away from it.I search the area for my clothes, but find nothing on the floor except the empty bottles and discarded burger. Cuts and bruises cover my knees and shins, and a discoloured purple patch, consumes half my left arm. At least that answers the mystery behind my throbbing pain, although how it came to be remains a riddle.
Closing my eyes, I focus and think, but all I remember is standing outside the office. I suppose I drank, but how much? I’ve suffered through horrendous hangovers before, but never like this. This isn’t me. I don’t do this. Neither do I confront my boss the way I did.
I’m not sure who I am anymore. I may not remember last night, but I remember everything else. All those moments I wish I couldn’t. All those times I wish were different.
Heaving myself onto my knees, I struggle to my feet and stumble towards the chipped and broken sink. Head spinning and body swaying, I cling to the porcelain with all my might.
“Shit,” I sigh, starring at the apparent man looking back: red-eyed, with puffy cheeks, bruised forehead and grazed chin. My hair loops around itself into knotted strands. My nose, blue and tender, even larger and more crooked than usual. Despite feeling frozen and shivering, I drip with sweat. I have chapped lips and cracked skin, and patchy stubble breaking through the surface.
“You did it, B,” I say, my eyes welling like they have so often of late. “You’ve broken me. You did this. I loved you and trusted you so much, but you’ve broken me.” I shake my head and wipe away the tears bulging in the corner of my eyes. “I hate you, B. I hate you.”
On Creating a Playlist by Matthew Turner
I‘m not sure about you, but in my opinion music and books go hand-in-hand. They both have the power to share beautiful stories, albeit in rather different ways. When it comes to my own writing, music is never far away.
It not only inspires me to write, but helps build stronger relationships with the characters I create. You can learn a lot about someone based on their musical tastes, and appreciating what the characters of my latest novel, I Unlove You, like to listen to helped me hone in on their personality and the journey they go on.
A lot of songs and artists are mentioned throughout my latest novel, and I was excited when Sandy asked me to write this because I’ve been looking forward to creating this I Unlove You Playlist for a while, complete with a teaser line to hint at why this song might be important to a particular character or scene:
- Oasis – Wonderwall – “I don’t believe that anybody / Feels the way I do about you now”
- The Pixies – Here Comes Your Man – “You’ll never wait so long / Here comes your man”
- Simon and Garfunkel – The Only Living Boy in New York – “Hey, I’ve got nothing to do today but smile”
- The Beatles – Here Comes The Sun – “Little darling, I feel that ice is slowly melting”
- The Rolling Stones – Beast of Burden – “My back is broad but it’s a hurting”
- Tallest Man On Earth – The Gardener – “I find it soothing I’m afraid”
- The Shins – Caring is Creepy – “On rocks I dreamt of where we’d stepped”
- The Velvet Underground – Pale Blue Eyes – “Thought of you as everything, / I’ve had but couldn’t keep”
- Bob Dylan – Hurricane – “All of Rubin’s cards were marked in advance”
- Elvis Presley – I Got A Woman – “Well, she’s my baby / And I’m her loving man”
- Frank Zappa – Camarillo Brillo – “An’ I’d just love it in her room”
- Eric Clapton – Wonderful Tonight – “I feel wonderful because I see / The love light in your eyes”
- Donovan – Catch The Wind – “When rain has hung the leaves with tears / I want you near to kill my fears”
- Damien Rice – 9 Crimes – “Give my gun away when it’s loaded”
- Bright Eyes – First Day of My Life – “Yours is the first face that I saw / I think I was blind before I met you”
- Cliff Richard – Mistletoe & Wine – “A time for living, a time for believing / A time for trusting, not deceiving”
Or see the playlist in Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL7MZmDNGy5-xm-SE8HNwLPLoIwyVdi20Z
If you happen to like a song, I encourage you to support the artist. Like writers, they need the help of amazing people like you. In the coming weeks I’ll be delving deeper into the musical journey with a special radio-style show of this playlist to explore the roles these songs play in I Unlove You. We’ve even started linking songs to treasured books in the Merry Misfits Group – a facebook community all about removing barriers between Authors, Reviewers and Fans, take a look and you’re welcome to join in.
With that, I’ll bid you farewell, but not before I ask you one thing: if you could match any song to any of your treasured fictional characters or scenes, which song would you choose and why?
Goodreads: goodreads.com/matthewturner
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1st Person Bio:
My name is Matthew Turner, and I’m a British author who tends to write Coming-of-Age New Adult stories about life, love, and those wandering thoughts that roam your mind.
You can often find me in a coffee shop, enjoying a rich black mug of the good stuff whilst I read or write. And if I’m not doing this, I may be with my delightful son, George. He not only keeps me on my toes, but inspires me to write and make him proud each day.
Thanks for taking an interest in my pen scratching ways. I don’t see you as a reader, rather a friend in waiting. As such, please don’t be shy. Be part of this journey and say hello to me, and if you’d like to know more you can check out my site: turndog.co.
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